I can still smell this morning’s coffee and the rain on his shirt.
But he still looked presentable. He has a respectable aura, even if he isn’t the most polite gentlemanly guy…
Which he tries to be. Opening the door, offering a hand with everything, carrying my bag, helping me study…
And he’s such a smooth talker, he knows it, I don’t why people sweet talk. “You look cute when you’re revising, trying to at least,” my heart melts a bit but I don’t want it to be because of the way he treats me… Though I’m so delighted he does. I wouldn’t want it to be anyone else looking at me saying “You look lonely”
He’s smart. Genuinely clever. Walking around in a suit and looking smug. “copper oxide, a slow release of gas bubbles. The lime water did not change. The solid in the test tube was green.” (copper = green. Mind you, I learnt that today) I stutter on about carbon dioxide which is wrong and he says:
How do I explain this without telling you the answer?
And I, honestly, wow. It’s not everyone’s I love you. But… To me, he couldn’t have said anything better. I mean he was actually trying to help me. You see he had to think about it. You can see he wanted me to get the right answer. So much so that he said “get this one right and I will kiss you.” ha!
I’m glad we didn’t. Not today. Because he loaded the gun and told me If i was good enough to pull the trigger.
And well… I never answered the question. It was only three marks. I think he believed I could truly do it. But I had no idea that the production of steel uses oxygen because it needs oxygen to react to carbon but the production of titanium uses argon because it’s unreactive. Any oxygen reacts with magnesium.
I’m sleepy but I had to write down. I don’t think I could tell him any of this really.
I get attached quickly, even though this wasn’t a ferrar. I’m afraid my attachment might be too much, I don’t want it to be just about him but I always need someone to give me reason.
He gives me something to talk about that’s not the shit in my head. I know it’s chemicals that make me clingy to you. Which is funny, even if you say not everything has to be funny.
I’ve lost my point. I always do. I get side tracked. Distracted. And I enjoy it. I’m going to need a lot more typing time. Sleepy again. Nununumunight.